Will She Love Her Always?

I have been very blessed to have a good elder daughter who welcomed her little sister into the family readily and with great enthusiasm. I know of others who had lot of sibling rivalries to deal with and I was glad I didn’t have any of those.

Joey loves her little sister, always kisses and hugs her, and lovingly calls Baby Jayne her ‘baby’.

Sometimes her love may be a little ‘overpowering’, but..

…I think Baby Jayne secretly likes it. =P

I have always been careful around Joey and Jayne, and if anyone is paying attention or playing with Jayne, I will try to engage Joey as well so that she doesn’t feel that everyone’s focusing on Jayne only.

Today was the first time I detected some weird expressions on her face. I was bringing my two kids down the stairs to meet my dad who came to pick us up for dinner. Joey, as usual, was very excited to see Grandpa, and kept chanting, ‘Gong Gong! Gong Gong!’, but my dad’s first words were, ‘Hello Yixin (Jayne’s chinese name)!’ I could almost sense Joey’s bewilderment. At that moment, I felt really sorry for her. Before Baby Jayne came along, she was the only one who’s got attention lavished upon!

I do understand that babies naturally attract more attention and most people like to play with the babies and make them smile, but I definitely don’t want my Joey’s confidence to be hurt because of that. Thank God my dad turned his attention to Joey immediately after that, and carried her all the way to the car. It soothed the situation somewhat.

It kind of rang an alarm in my head. From the beginning till now, things seemed to be going well between the sisters. Even though I had feared that Joey will feel the loss as the only kid in the family, she has been responding surprisingly well. But that doesn’t mean I can relax and take things for granted. Kids’ ego and emotions are weak and easily bruised and hurt. If I am not careful, my kids may be hurt without me knowing it and that’s definitely not what I want.

While I know I cannot control people’s reactions to Jayne in front of Joey, I can only keep instilling in her the fact that Jayne is her sister and she is to love and take care of her forever. So far, this tactic has worked perfectly because Joey is a born leader who feels a need to take care of everyone around her, and because she is an elder sister, she is responsible for her little sister. Plus, it really helps that Joey is very fond of Jayne.

My wish is that the two sisters will continue to love and cherish each other, grow up enjoying each other’s companionship and eventually stay as best of friends. And my prayer is that sibling rivalry will never be an issue, and even as they are growing up, I will be a good mum who does not make either one of them feel that I have a favorite between them. In my eyes, they are both precious and special.