"Bye! I'm Going To Get Married!"

My kids have always been drama queens. The husband blames it entirely on my genes, and I'm not denying it.

The littlest one in the family is always imaginative and constantly tells us all kinds of stories involving different imaginary friends. Interestingly, she reuses a few of the names all the time, so at some point, I actually became confused if they are real or imaginary. She would spin stories of what her friends did and what they told her, and pretend talk to them on her toy phone. Pretty normal stuff for a four-year-old.

Recently, she started a new antic though - She would carry her backpack, put on a special pair of shoes and declare loudly, "Bye! I am going to get married!"

Behold her wedding day look.

Dora backpack - Her favourite, absolutely understandable.

But these, I have difficulties comprehending why she chose this pair of (ahem) clogs among her many pairs of beautiful shoes. I half suspect it's because of the court-court sounds they make when she walks. You know, like high-heel shoes.

When asked who she was going to marry, she answered without hesitation, "DADDY!"

Congrats, Mr Kuan. You've got yet another admirer in da house. =)

Technorati Tags: kids,married,kids talk

Oppa Gangnam Style - Version J

The girls in my house have caught on with the very popular Korean song now - Oppa Gangnam style. It first started with a birthday celebration a group of friends and I did for my boss, where we performed Oppa Gangnam Style dance for her in a restaurant. Baby Jayne was there and she picked up some steps! In case you're not familiar with this very popular song (have you been hiding in some cave by the way?), check out this video first!

Baby Jayne cannot do the whole dance yet obviously, but she definitely likes the song very much, and I am sure with some practice, she will pick up the whole dance! See the sparkle in her eyes when the music comes on?? =P

The girls are so into Oppa Gangnam style now that they do it whenever they remember it, and sometimes, it may be a little embarrassing. But I guess 6 years as a mum has thickened up my skin a bit.

True, it's only ONE galloping action now, but this definitely sends a signal my way that my girls have interest in dancing. I am so gonna send them to Oppa Gangnam School of Dance soon. Oh yeah.

The Joey & Jayne Philosophy To Life

One of life’s greatest lessons is NEVER UNDERESTIMATE YOUR KIDS. They are completely capable of making you choke with the things they say.

* * * * *

Filial Piety

Jayne: “Mummy, I am going to buy you lots of things when I grow up.”
Mummy: *eyes sparkling & thinking about Prada* “Wow, baby that’s so nice of you! What are you going to buy for Mummy??”
Jayne: “I will buy you porridge with fried dough sticks. You like to eat them right?”
Mummy: “……..Errr yeah, thanks babe.”

Kissing Rights

Mummy: “I love you so much, baby….” *attempts to give Jayne a smooch*
Jayne: *pushes Mummy’s face away with her hand* “Mummy, you cannot kiss me. Only my boyfriend can kiss me on my mouth.”
Mummy: ????? *makes mental note NOT to let the kids watch iCarly anymore*

A Failed Threat

Mummy: Joey, if you don’t sleep now, I’m not going to bring you to the playground later. You can stay at home alone while I bring Jayne there.
Joey: You won’t do that de la. You are a mummy, how can a mummy leave her daughter alone at home?
Mummy: ^&%$#$@$

Birthdays

(Overheard)
Joey to Jayne: My birthday is in April, how about yours?
Jayne: Banana
Joey: Huh what banana? I’m asking you which month is your birthday!
Jayne: Ya, yours is apple, mine is banana.
Joey: Aiyo April la, April!! Not Apple! *-*

Upgrading

Joey: Mummy, why don’t we shift to a condominium? It looks nice.
Mummy: Are you going to give me the money to do so?
Joey: Yeah of course. I have money at home.
Mummy: Oh you do?
Joey: A lot of money. I can give you $5.
Mummy: Errr thanks….

Self-Image

Mummy: Baby, do you know that I love you sooooo much??
Jayne: But I am not a baby anymore hor. I am a little girl now.
Mummy: ……………..

Life is never dull with them around. =)

The Smoothie Machine

During Joey’s 4th birthday, she received a smoothie cum ice-cream making machine as a present. We finally brought it out to try the other day. I was curious to see if a toy like that could really work.

Took out the toy, assembled it and washed it clean.

My plan was to make dragonfruit smoothie and ice-cream, so I went along and bought 2 lovely dragonfruits!

So pretty that it’s almost unreal..

Joey was excited to try it!

Dragonfruit is one of her favorite fruits!

After cutting the dragonfruit into cubes, Joey helped to scoop them into the blender.

Ah so lovely… =)

Added ice cubes into the blender so that the smoothie will turn out to the cold and nice..

The next logical step would be to start the blender, right?

-

-

-

-

Get ready for an anti-climax. 

  THE BLENDER MOTOR WAS SPOILT. 

Great. Wonderful. How nice. Tremendous. Fantastic. Fabulous!

There was absolutely no way I could test whether this toy was a real ice-cream maker or not because it.wont.even.start. IT.WONT.START!!!!! And it’s brand new, for goodness’ sake! Even the batteries were brand new, hello??!

Needless to say, we were both very disappointed and had to go for ice-cream outside just to make ourselves feel better. Boohoooooooooooooooooo!!!

“Daddy, I Wanna Marry You…”

I’ve heard it many times before from other little girls. Their concept of marriage is very simple – They should marry the person they like the most.

And so, when my Joey said that statement, I wasn’t surprised, but it was hilarious.

We were at the market having breakfast when she blurted out, ‘I don’t have a boyfriend leh…’. We were all amused and I asked her, ‘Why must you have a boyfriend now?’, to which she replied, ‘Because all the jie jie have boyfriends.’ I’m not really sure who she was referring to, but obviously some kids around her had been saying things like that. =.=

Then all of a sudden, she said, ‘Daddy, I wanna marry you.’ Haha! We were all so tickled by it! Joey, on the other hand, didn’t think it was a joke and she was a little bewildered why we were laughing. =P

I didn’t blog about this, but about a month ago, Joey said the same thing to me, ‘Mummy, I wanna marry you!’, and I had to tell her that girls don’t marry girls. Girls marry boys. (Must set the record right early, just in case!!!)

And I wonder if that’s why she decided that she must marry Daddy instead. Haha!

Anyway, I wanted to tease her, so I told her, ‘Joey, you cannot marry Daddy, because Daddy is already married to me!’

She was stumped! kekeke!

I love how innocent my little girl is. =)

And obviously, she adores her Daddy. =D

Do Not Leave Your Baby Unattended

I let Baby rest on the bed propped up slightly on a pillow. The always-thoughtful me laid a diaper cloth over the pillow for hygiene sake. You know baby’s skin is so delicate, right? So she was resting quietly watching the sun beams coming in from the windows. I sat back facing her at the edge of the bed, watching an interesting programme on TV.

When I turned over just 30 seconds later, this was what greeted me:

WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I’m sorry if I sounded mean. But it was a really funny sight to behold! I mean, I got a shock because it was totally not what I expected to see! But, she just laid there without making any noise at all (ok, her legs were slightly kicking, but it made it all the more funnier!), letting the cloth cover her face like that. One might even think it was comfortable that way!

Before you think I’m so inhuman, I DID NOT immediately whip out the camera to take a photo when I discovered her whole head covered by the cloth. What I did was the only logical thing any mummy would do – SAVE MY CHILD.

The above was merely a re-enactment to bring out the moral of the story: DO NOT LEAVE YOUR CHILD UNATTENDED.

p/s: It actually was not as dangerous as it seemed. The cloth was just floating above her face, and she seemed mildly amused by it. I have no doubt that she would scream her head off if she felt suffocated in any way.

The 1st Question Has Come

I should have seen it coming. But, I really didn’t think it would be this soon. My Joey is still a baby, isn’t she? She still goes gaga over Mickey Mouse Clubhouse cartoons on Disney Channel, hums Barney songs and wears pretty much what I pick out for her to wear, doesn’t she?

It’s my fault. I ought to be more prepared for this. I had naively thought that I would handle everything with professionalism and great wisdom. After all, I supposedly should have gazillion tons more wit than my little baby girl, isn’t it? Is it?

The fateful day was Thursday, July 23, 2009. Yesterday.

Joey was in my bedroom when she saw me open up a SANITARY PAD (sorry boys, you might experience some discomfort reading this particular entry). As per her usual personality, she immediately asked, ‘Mummy, what’s that?’

I was stumped for a total of 3 seconds.

Of course, I would love to tell her that it’s a sanitary pad, and women need to use it because they go through menstruation every month which is basically the shedding of the uterine lining or endometrium, and it occurs on a regular basis in reproductive-age females of certain mammal species.

But of course, that was not what I said.

Amidst my stammering errr-s.. and ahhh-s, I managed to utter something which I thought was at her level of understanding. Ahem. ‘It’s for collecting something. Mummy needs to put it on the panty.’

Silence. She didn’t look one bit convinced. Silence.

“Collect what?”

My heart sank. Come on, I can’t possibly tell her it’s for collecting BLOOD right? That will scare the wits out of her and possibly smear her innocent childhood! She might never want to grow up!

“Errr… something dirty la…” (desperately thinking of something else to say to divert her attention away)

More silence.

Then all of a sudden, her eyes lit up with elated understanding of Mummy’s parables and she blurted, “Oh I know, it’s a DIAPER! Right?” then proceeded to stare at me with the most beautiful innocent round eyes in this whole world.

I just said yes as softly as possible (totally un-intelligent, I admit) and quickly changed our topic to what she ate in school for lunch yesterday.

See. I totally ruined it.

Oh my gosh, my girl is slowly morphing into a young lady day by day and soon enough, she’ll be ushered into the world of stomach cramps & PMS! *breaks out in nervous laugh*

I am so not looking forward to the day when she will ask me where she came from and how did daddy & mummy make Baby Jayne go into mummy’s tummy.

I Don’t Know What Kind of Smile This Is

We were in the car this morning on our way to Joey’s school, and I decided to take some photos of Joey. It seems that I’ve been lazier in doing that nowadays. Except for those times we bring her out for excursions, I seldom take day-to-day photographs of Joey now. I better keep it up, in order to capture her ever-changing looks in her growing-up years!

This was the first photo we took.

Obviously the smile looks very forced, as if Mummy is forcing her to comply, so I told her it was not acceptable and she is to SMILE NICELY. The subsequent photos made me LAUGH!

This is what she perceived as ‘SMILE NICELY’???

 

 

What’s with the slanted head & sly smile??

(Don’t Bother) Reasoning With A Kid

Joey now sleeps on her own bed in her grandma’s bedroom, in preparation for Jayne’s arrival. Got to keep the 2 kids sleeping in 2 separate rooms so that they don’t wake up each other. It would be disastrous if Jayne wakes up for her night feed and Joey wakes up crying as well!

So, last night, Joey was getting ready for bed, and suddenly got fascinated by shadows. Made me play with her for a while (you know those stuffs about making shadows of dogs & birds using your hand to cast the shadows on the wall), then insisted that I lie down with her to sleep.

I wanted her to learn sleeping on her own, so I told her that my stomach doesn’t feel very comfortable and it was a little painful (I think indigestion or something), hoping that she would understand and let me go back to my room to rest while she sleeps on her own.

Who knows, she started dishing out ‘solutions’ to my problems.

First, she went to fetch the Ruyi oil, and insisted on applying onto my tummy to drive away the pain (like I always do for her when she complains of stomach pain).

Then when I tried to explain to her that Ruyi oil is only for her and Mei Mei Jayne next time, she went on and on about how her Nai Nai also had stomachache the other time, and she too helped her apply the Ruyi oil and then she felt better. She ended the explanation by stating clearly that, ‘So Ruyi oil is for Joey, Jayne & Nai Nai.’

How politically correct.

Then she told me I should use a blanket to cover my tummy area (like i always told her too) so that it can keep that area warm and my stomach will feel better. By now, I was really hoping to go back to my room to rest… (very bad & un-motherly, I know).

I told you Joey has got a strong maternity side of her.

The Drama King & Queen

I don’t even have to try to explain where Joey’s drama queen genes come from, do I?

 

These 2 very good at pretending. Papa Isaiah: You got to stop saying I am the drama queen ok?!!

被她骗了

That day in the car, Joey wanted to take photos with me.

Joey: Mummy, we don't smile ok?

Mummy (innocently): Ok!

And this was the 1st photo we took:

She told me NOT to smile, but she smiled sweetly herself lor! Mummy looked like super unfriendly in this photo because of that.

Then Joey said, 'OK mummy, now we smile ok?' Of course I agreed! And this was the 2nd photo we took:

This one is not PURPOSELY is what??!!! Bluff me lor!

Mummy (trying not to lose her patience): "Let's just take a proper photo together, can??"

And this was the 3rd photo:

She HAD to dig her nose!!!

Finally, after several tries, she cooperated and we ended up with some rather synchronised shots:

This one was suggested by Joey!

I look very spastic, I know.

Don’t You Love My Pouty Lips??

Heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee...

What a very bo liao post. Hahahaha...

我家那个小大人

Yes indeed. My daughter can't wait to grow up obviously. She loves to behave and act like an adult now, and can I tell you?

IT'S HILARIOUS!!!!!!

Some tell-tale signs that my daughter thinks that she's an adult:

1) She commands you to do something, and she adds a ' 快点啦！' at the end of her command. All happens concurrently with a roll eye, frown on the forehead, slight irritation in her voice and a very impatient stare. Hello girl, who's the mother here? Huh?!!

2) She insists on using the chopsticks to eat EVERYTHING and that includes rice, porridge (sad but it's true), meat, soup (yes I know)... and no, she cannot hold her chopsticks yet, so you can imagine how long & how messy it gets at every mealtime where you can find a pair of chopsticks on the table.

3) If the mother (that's me!) whines, her maternal instincts jump right out & she goes into her 'Taiwanese soap opera' mode, shove my head onto her chest and she hugs me tightly and pats me on the head (sayang) and at the same time, whine along with me, "Muuummmmyyyy.......". Not joking. Ask any of my friends who have personally witnessed this. Very very drama.

4) She asks a question and when you answer, she gives a very 'adult' 'OOOHHHHH' and look very satisfied with herself that she understood the answer......... and then ask the very same question again barely 30 seconds later. (tat's life..).

My daughter is growing up so fast I can't do anything about it!!!!!!!!!! argghhhh!!!

I think I'll go whine now.

I Think My MIL Has Something Against Joey

She wanted to play with her make-up and she got 'decorated' instead.

* I'm joking lah! My MIL loves her like crazy! *