It dawned upon me yesterday when one of my readers DM on Instagram that she has been following my blog since Joey was in Primary One, that this was a milestone totally worth documenting on the blog. After all, this blog first began because of Joey and now that she has completed her first major academic milestone, we have every reason to rejoice & celebrate with her. :)
This year, I was most frequently asked by friends, “Are you nervous for PSLE?”, “How are the preparations for PSLE?”, “Which Secondary School does Joey want to go?”. My answers have always been, “I’m okay.. not nervous or ganchiong at all.” which was the truth. I’ve never been a tiger-mum and I mostly leave it to my kids to do their own studying. After all, it’s really their own future and they ought to take ownership and responsibility. Of course, once in a while I would still do my due negligence and give gentle reminders here and there, but thankfully, my kids are mostly conscientious on their own, so I don’t really need to worry much. Still, being the chill and calm mum that I am did not stop me from getting nervous when I saw the results being given out yesterday.
Everyone – Principal, teachers, students and parents – were gathered in the School Hall yesterday at 11am, all nervous and excited to see the results. The Principal gave her prep talk about how results don’t define all of us and reminded the parents at least five times that we should all celebrate our kids’ achievements regardless of whether they did well or not, and that won the applause of all the parents present. Even though I was very sure all the parents had their fingers crossed at that point. =X
After what seemed like an eternity of the Principal speaking, it was finally the time for the students to go to their respective classes where they would receive their result slips from their Form Teachers. The parents were told to follow the classes as they were called out. The kids settled down in their classrooms and the parents gathered outside peering in through the windows. I thought the kids all looked pale and almost none of them had a smile on their faces. Many of them sat with their backs to the excited parents standing outside. Poor kids – How nerve-wrecking was this for 12-year-olds?
I surprised myself by how nervous I felt. My heart was pounding so quickly and it had to be that Joey was among one of the last few to receive her results. She went back to her desk and looked intently at her results. I tried to decipher her facial expressions – Was it good? Was it bad? I guessed it was not exactly fantastic because otherwise, she would have ran out and screamed. =P Instead, she was calm and collected as she walked out towards us and I heard her mutter, “It was not good…”
I looked at her results slip and heave a sigh of relief. It was GOOD. Good because it was within my expectations and she had accomplished this completely on her own hard work with zero tuition! I thought that was quite a big feat for a 12-year-old and she should totally be proud of herself! Plus, with this result, she would likely be able to get into a school of her choice. But she was on the verge of tears because it was slightly below her own expectations, and we had to comfort her and affirm her that it was a super good result and she should celebrate! Some of her classmates were crying in the classroom and others just looked very dazed. Of course, there were some who had big smiles as well – Hard work paid off!
As a parent watching all these drama going on around me, how did I feel? More than the actual results, I was more concerned about how these 12-year-olds will manage their emotions. Those who did well and above their expectations would of course have much to celebrate and rejoice, but how about those who did not meet their own expectations? Many people think that the kids nowadays suffer from the stress given by their parents or peer pressure, but to be honest, from my personal experience, these 12-year-olds put more stress on themselves with their own expectations than anybody else. Joey didn’t even know how the rest of her classmates did, until much later - Her initial disappointment came solely from her own expectations.
Back to a month ago when Joey finished her PSLE exams, she felt really confident that she would do well. I was glad that she had good positive vibes about it, of course. But on the other hand, I wanted to prepare her heart in case it did not turn out the way she thought it would be. There are just too many factors that can affect the final aggregate score you would receive – the bell-curve determined by how the entire P6 cohort performed, your condition during exam, whether you went out-of-point or made careless mistakes. Even a student who has performed consistently well is not guaranteed to get good results in PSLE. On the morning of receiving the results, I did my prep talk with Joey again and I reminded her that no matter the results, let’s give thanks to God for everything and trust that God will lead her to the right Secondary School where she will make many new friends who love her, and she would enjoy her Secondary School life.
When we got home, Papa Isaiah got Joey to sit down and he reiterated that we ought to thank God for bringing her through the PSLE and for the good results that she got because of her hard work. Then he got Joey to pray a prayer of thanksgiving to God – I was frankly touched by her prayers. She thanked God for the good results, for taking care of her and she also prayed that she will do even better when she goes to Secondary School. Then Papa Isaiah ended with a prayer of blessing for her. :) Joey looked evidently happier after that, possibly also because she got to know all her other friends’ results and she seemed to be the one with the best results so far. =P She even tried to comfort her classmate by messaging her that she ought to be proud of her own results because they were not bad at all, and how there are many others who won’t even have the chance to go to the Secondary School of their choice. Haha!
At this point, I’m just glad the episode is over and we are going to believe and trust God for the posting results. Whichever school Joey gets posted to, my prayer is that she will enjoy the friendships and school life, and make a difference wherever she goes. Papa & Mama are so proud of you, Joey! And we will always have your back, no matter what happens. =)
She asked for udon for celebration dinner last night. =D
